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A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
by The Maugles

A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles

Related topics: Funny Friendship Relationship

Moreover if your brother shall trespass against you,
go and tell him his fault between you and him alone.
- Matthew 18:15

This day I will marry my friend,
the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love.
- Anonymous

A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer

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Thank You,
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The greatest gift is a portion of thyself.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

A friend is someone who knows all about you,
and loves you just the same.
- Elbert Hubbard

The key is to keep company only with people who uplift you,
whose presence calls forth your best.
- Epictetus

 

The best way to destroy an enemy
is to make him a friend.
- Abraham Lincoln

Lord, grant comfort, joy and health
to those I call friend,
to those I call enemy,
and to those I have cursed by my indifference.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The most called-upon prerequisite of a friend is an accessible ear.
- Maya Angelou

Love is the only force capable of
transforming an enemy into friend.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Why live?
Adding one to my count of days, or postponing
a feared death by another day do not inspire me.
I live to experience something new each day -
to learn something new, meet a new friend,
bring joy into someone's life,
feel the wind newly on my skin,
touch a new fear, a new anger,
and with focused intent and good fortune,
find an ample measure of my own joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If you wish to succeed in life,
make perseverance your bosom friend,
experience your wise counselor,
caution your elder brother,
and hope your guardian genius.
- Joseph Addison

The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that
they can grow separately without growing apart.
- Elisabeth Foley

We need to find God, and he cannot
be found in noise and restlessness.
God is the friend of silence.
See how nature - trees, flowers, grass-
grows in silence; see the stars,
the moon and the sun, how they move in silence...
We need silence to be able to touch souls.
- Mother Teresa

Our chief want is someone who will inspire us
to be what we know we could be.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Work Hard. Do your best. Keep your word.
Never get too big for your britches.
Trust in God. Have no fear;
and Never forget a friend.
- Harry S. Truman

The meeting of two personalities is
like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
- Carl Jung

Neither a borrower nor a lender be,
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
- William Shakespeare

Time is my friend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The happiest moments my heart knows are those in which
it is pouring forth its affections to a few esteemed characters.
- Thomas Jefferson

The greatest compliment that was ever paid me
was when one asked me what I thought,
and attended to my answer.
- Henry David Thoreau

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.
It turns what we have into enough, and more.
It turns denial into acceptance,
chaos to order, confusion to clarity.
It can turn a meal into a feast,
a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.
Gratitude makes sense of our past,
brings peace for today,
and creates a vision for tomorrow.
- Melody Beattie

I live to experience something new each day -
to learn something new,
meet a new friend,
bring joy into someone's life,
feel the wind newly on my skin,
touch a new fear, a new anger,
and with focused intent and good fortune,
find an ample measure of my own joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Be true to your work, your word, and your friend.
- Henry David Thoreau

The easiest kind of friendship for me
is with ten thousand people.
The hardest is with one.
- Joan Baez

The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson

The finest kind of friendship is between people
who expect a great deal of each other but never ask it.
- Anonymous

Health is the greatest possession.
Contentment is the greatest treasure.
Confidence is the greatest friend.
Non-being is the greatest joy.
- Lao Tzu

The language of Friendship is not words, but meanings.
It is an intelligence above language.
- Henry David Thoreau

An old friend will help you move.
A good friend will help you move a dead body.
- Jim Hayes

Throw your dreams into space like a kite,
and you do not know what it will bring back,
a new life, a new friend, a new love, a new country.
- Anais Nin

Walking with a friend in the dark is better
than walking alone in the light.
- Helen Keller

The only thing to do is to hug one's friend tight and do one's job.
- Edith Wharton

A real friend is one who walks in
when the rest of the world walks out.
- Walter Winchell

A true friend is the one who
walks in when others walk out.
- Walter Winchell

A true friend is a rock upon whom you can depend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is my choice to care deeply about others.
No kindness is too small to be important -
the smile to the bank teller,
the sincere "thank you" for all kindnesses received,
the reassuring hand on the shoulder of a loved one or friend.
There is compassion in selfless generosity,
but there is also compassion in heartfelt empathy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Better to be a nettle in the side of your friend than his echo.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

He's my friend that speaks well of me behind my back.
- Thomas Fuller

A friend to all is a friend to none.
- Aristotle

A friend is someone who understands my past,
believes in my future,
and accepts me just the way I am.
- Anonymous

The best friend is the man who in wishing me well
wishes it for my sake.
- Anonymous

Your friend is the man who knows all about you,
and still likes you.
- Elbert Hubbard

A friend is one before whom I can think aloud.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

It takes a long time to grow an old friend.
- John Leonard

Never cease loving a person, and never give up hope for him,
for even the prodigal son who had fallen most low,
could still be saved; the bitterest enemy
and also he who was your friend could again be your friend;
love that has grown cold can kindle
- Soren Kierkegaard

A true friend is a source of strength and hope.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We can never replace a friend.
When a man is fortunate enough to have several,
he finds they are all different.
No one has a double in friendship.
- Johann Schiller

An insincere and evil friend is more
to be feared than a wild beast;
a wild beast may wound your body,
but an evil friend will wound your mind.
- The Buddha

When you part from your friend, you grieve not;
For that which you love most in him may be
clearer in his absence,
as the mountain to the climber
is clearer from the plain.
- Khalil Gibran

You can learn how to let go of the past.
Whether you have experienced a break up
with someone you cared for deeply,
whether death has taken a loved one,
whether you have had a feud with a friend or family member,
whether you have lost a job.
Move on and let go.
Life can be joyful and rewarding again.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A single rose can be my garden...
a single friend, my world.
- Leo Buscaglia

A friend is one who walks in when others walk out
- Walter Winchell

So long as we are loved by others,
I would almost say that we are indispensable;
and no man is useless while he has a friend.
- Robert Louis Stevenson

The only reward of virtue is virtue;
the only way to have a friend is to be one.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me.
- Henry Ford

A friend is someone who won't stop
until he finds you and brings you home.
- Fraser Sr. in the movie Due South

You only meet your once in a lifetime friend ...
once in a lifetime.
- Little Rascals

A true friend is one who believes in you
when you have ceased to believe in yourself.
- Anonymous

I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar,
but I cherish the friend who for me
does not consult his calendar.
- Robert Brault

In my friend, I find a second self.
- Isabel Norton

A friend in need is a friend indeed.
- Latin Proverb

What is a friend? I will tell you ...
it is someone with whom you dare to be yourself.
- Frank Crane

A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson

A true friend never gets in your way
unless you happen to be going down.
- Arnold H. Glasgow

A brother is a friend given by Nature.
- Jean Baptiste Legouve

When you are alone you are not alone,
you are simply lonely -
and there is a tremendous difference
between loneliness and aloneness.
When you are lonely you are thinking of the other,
you are missing the other.
Loneliness is a negative state.
You are feeling that it would have been
better if the other were there -
your friend, your wife, your mother,
your beloved, your husband.
It would have been good if the other
were there, but the other is not.
Loneliness is absence of the other.
Aloneness is the presence of oneself.
Aloneness is very positive.
It is a presence, overflowing presence.
You are so full of presence
that you can fill the whole universe
with your presence and there is no need for anybody.
- Osho

The best mirror is an old friend.
- Proverb

A friend is one who has the same enemies as you have.
- Abraham Lincoln

Each friend represents a world in us,
a world possibly not born until they arrive,
and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.
- Anais Nin


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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